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Flight Attendant Joe: Top Five Posts of 2017


For 2017




A Letter To My 11 Year Old Self

November 10, 2017

Dear Joe,

Before you crinkle up this paper and throw it into the wastebasket next to the window, I implore you to read it. If not for you, for me — because I am you. But from 34 years in the future.

I am sending this to you on your 11th birthday, November 10, 1983, so pay attention.

Seriously, turn down your walkman and listen to me carefully. Trust me, you’ll have plenty of years to listen to Madonna’s Lucky Star. And honestly, you are in for such a treat — wait until 1998 when she releases Ray of Light.

Oh, and 2005, Confessions on a Dance Floor.

I figured that would get your attention.


A Tribute to Ali Strickland!

This was taken in February 2014 in Boston. Ali always made you smile. Always.

When I am in pain or sad, I find writing my feelings out to be as cathartic as downing a few bottles of wine. To be honest, I usually do that too.

Earlier this week, I heard the news that my friend and coworker, Ali Strickland, passed away. It was quite shocking and came out of nowhere. After reading the posts on Facebook, and confirming with a friend that she was no longer with us, I sat on my bed staring at the wall asking the questions I expect everyone asks when someone they care about dies… What? How? When? What? How is that possible? 

Then… Why do all the good ones die so soon?


Tips About Inside Airplane Temperature


One of my favorite things about Facebook is the On This Day feature. I love looking back to see where I was, or what I was thinking — or doing — on a specific day. This morning while sitting on the patio drinking my coffee, I came across a comment from 2013 where someone asked me to write a post about air conditioning etiquette on the airplane. What do I do if it’s too cold? What do I do when I’m sweating my balls off? Why is there mist coming into the airplane? Are we all gonna die? 

You know, the important questions that float across your mind while sitting in your middle seat squished between some young guy wearing shorts, a tank top, and flip flops and some old lady covering herself in three wool sweaters.

My first suggestion is… BE NICE! Be nice to your flight attendant when inquiring about the temperature on the airplane. I can’t stress this enough, so I will say it again, in big bold letters — BE NICE TO YOUR FLIGHT ATTENDANT WHEN INQUIRING ABOUT THE TEMPERATURE ON THE AIRPLANE!


SkyWest Flight Attendant Charged With Causing Two Emergency Landings!

Pictured provided by FAJoe

Is it me or has everyone gone crazy?

USA Today Travel published an article regarding a Skywest flight attendant, Justin Cox-Sever, and his involvement in causing two emergency landings. The first one from July 7 and the most recent on September 9 when he stuffed a bag with towels and then reported to the flight deck that he found an unoccupied bag that was beeping. Both aircraft diverted and after searched by authorities found no life threatening devices.


A Letter To Equality Haters From Flight Attendant Joe!

Joe & Matt   - 35
Me and my husband Matt. We got married in Connecticut in 2005. It was called a Civil Union back then but in 2010 it transitioned into a marriage. No big deal. It’s just marriage!

Dear Simple Minded Ignorant Bigots,

Hi. It’s Flight Attendant Joe. You know, the inappropriate gay guy who runs a blog and writes stupid jokes about mean flight attendants, horny pilots, and asshole airline passengers. Yeah, that’s him. The guy writing the book. Yup!


Russian Passenger Gets Naked At Airport Security Checkpoint


Screenshot 2015-02-18 at 8
Photo taken screenshot from YouTube.

Hot Damn! Why can’t I ever be behind the dude who gets butt naked at the security checkpoint?


14 Photos from 2014!

Facing My Fears At The High Noon Gun Range!


I’m afraid of guns. Well, let me rephrase that – I fear the power that is unleashed from a gun. Because of that fear while I was vacationing in Florida I asked a friend to take me shooting. I often talk about fear and the control it has over our lives. Fear is toxic so I wanted to face this fear head on.


I call this one… Fish Bukkake!

Downtown Tacoma!

If I was mayor of Tacoma my first order of business would be to rename this fountain – Fish Bukkake!

Second order of business would be to replace the water with a nice Pinot Grigio for afternoon picnics and Saturday afternoon bukkake parties*.

*All Saturday afternoon bukkake parties are subject to city council approval. 

Happy 4th of July!


A Few Things You Should Do In Puerto Vallarta



Puerto Vallarta, Mexico is a fantastic destination to spend a week doing absolutely nothing. That is – once you get over Montezuma’s Revenge and peel yourself off the toilet. When I travel I never take a moment to just BE. I am always on the go and barely get enough sleep each night to tackle what I have on my agenda for the next day. For years I’ve been telling myself that I should take a vacation where I am forced to lay around reading, eating, and drinking. I thought the only way I would experience a vacation like that would be to prison myself on a cruise ship. I was wrong.


Daydreaming of Alaska!


Railroad tracks along Seward Hwy from Anchorage to Portage Glacier. Alaska!

Throwback Thursday: I wasn’t always a flight attendant.


Before I took to the skies as a flight attendant I spent many years as a nurse. One of my most memorable moments was being bite on the arm by a crazy lady in the ER who thought she was carrying Hitler’s baby. Oh yeah – and when I gave an unplanned douche to a lady patient when I was trying to administer an enema. Her exact words were, “Joe, that’s my vagina!”